Public

Dear Facebook couples:

None of us care how much you love each other or who is cutest. Please, help us to keep facebook posts free of those little heart things. Which I still have no clue how to create.



Not that i'm bitter about not knowing how or anything.


.....aw man......

Dear People: Nobody cares about your ridiculous relationship drama. Please, don't shove it in my face like an underdone steak burrito purchased from a sketchy Mexican eatery on the side of an interstate highway that will doubtlessly cause me to vomit uncontrollably into the nearest sink/tub shaped vessel.


With Love,

Isaac.

Dear World -

Tights ≠ pants. That's all i have to say about that one.

With love, Isaac

Halloween

Dear World:

Dressing up like a slut does not constitute a Halloween costume. That just makes you a slut.

With Love, Isaac

Laughter

Dear Facebook - no, you're not really rolling on the floor laughing, as you would not be able to reach the keyboard to type that you are. With love, Isaac.

Marriage

Dear Facebook - Nobody is legitimately married in high school, especially with friend of the same sex. please correct your relatioship status accordingly. With love, Isaac.

Politics

Dear Facebook - "Barack Obama" Is a candidate, not a legitimate political view. With Love, Isaac.